Thursday, August 27, 2009

Will you be my Tom?

Dress rehearsal for the MJ tribute at the Palms! Very exciting!

Last night I went and saw the indie flick "(500) days of summer". I loved this movie so much. I adored the part of the movie when Tom is talking about all the things he loves about Summer. "i love her smile, I love the way she laughs, I love the heart shaped birthmark on her chest" and then at the end of the story he is saying " i hate her smile, I hate her stupid laugh, I hate the cockroach shaped blob on her chest". I think we have all been Tom's and Summers. Tom, believer of true love, magic and hope. Summer, running away, doesn't want a commitment, wants to keep it light. I think what is funny is that we think as humans we can change people. As if we can love someone into loving us back. Tom is my dreamguy mostly because I think at one point, for a very long time, I was Tom. I spent years being amazing in hopes that at some point amazing would be enough to save other people hearts. I exhausted myself for love, but it never seemed like work, it seemed exactly like it was for Tom, like the best thing ever and means to have a song and dance montage in the morning. What happened next of course is that, I turned into a Summer. If you get hurt enough you just don't even have the energy to give an honest try to anyone. Summer didn't believe in Love. Summer kept everyone at arms length so that no one could really get close to her. Summer kept it really light.

At the end of the movie, Tom is sitting by himself, more successful than ever, looking cute as a button in his suit, still having everything remind him of Summer. You feel so bad for him because Summer has moved on and is getting married to someone else and Tom is still so gutted over all of it. When they speak Summer says that the reason she is okay being serious with her new guy is because "She is sure of all the things she never was with Tom". How gutting. I have been there. It is a terrible thing to hear.

But I think, as sad as I was for Tom, and myself, I was really happy. We all deserve someone who is sure. We deserve to be ready and accepting of Love. We all deserve a Tom who adores us and is our perfect dream boat of a guy. I have to believe that when I meet my match that there won't be any Summers in the picture, it will be just two Tom's (except, well you know).

So I am going to focus on the things I can control and be like Tom and work instead on creating my dream life. All I need is a giant chalkboard as a wall in my bedroom! Starting here! So excited to have my good friend Stacey Tookey rocking my line from Sugar and Bruno on "So You Think You Can Dance Canada" last night. She is rocking the Peace.Love.Dance. heathered Tee and it is available here.