Saturday, August 7, 2010

Have you ever had a truth inside you that was eating you alive?
That truth is going to really hurt someone you really care about.

Those are the kinds of days that are the hardest.

You have to tell the truth, because it is the right thing to do.
The truth you tell is causing pain to someone I love. I have to watch those tears well up in their eyes, and I know that from now on, no matter what I say, what kind of love is shared between the two of us, or even my very best intentions that in that instant that the truth spilled out of my mouth onto the table at the 101 in between our breakfast and the smell of you on my skin, that I had fallen off my pedestal.

there is no easy way out of that one is there?

The worst part about it for me, is that this truth, it makes me realize what a terrible person I am, and that does not affect my opinion on it at all. I am totally 100% okay with being this person.

I am not however okay with hurting anyone. Sometimes when you are in a situation like the one I am in, the best thing is to just tell the truth, do the hurting and hope for the best. Hope that the universe has some elaborate plan to make it all okay. That my dad was wrong when he said, "baby girl you cannot have it all at the same time"

I know my dad is right.
I know that I will really regret this.
I know that I will still do it.