I was having a conversation with someone today... a conversation I've previously had with the same person countless times. And although said person forgets what has been said the next day, i've realized that while trying to help her snap out of her depression I have helped myself to stop being such a douchebag.
So this person has lived her entire life being afraid of what other people might say. She has lived her life as the image of perfection on the outside, and a complete mess on the inside. 8 years ago something happened in her life, and even though it was something drastic that affected the lives of more than one person she still has not been able to let go. For the past 8 years she has been a workaholic and a very aggressive person who takes it all out on the people she loves.
She is an extraordinary person, but a martyr. She helps everyone around her but fails to see the good things that come to her and pushes them away.
The worst thing you can do is live by other people. Here's the thing, they're not the ones living your life. They're not going through your pain. They have no clue what goes on inside your head, or your home. People who have nothing better to do than discuss other people's lives are pretty much worthless and hence you should not even give them a second thought. When you do, you give them more chances to interfere with your own affairs and you let them get to you when you really shouldn't give a damn. At the end of the day it's your life. Live it. Do whatever you want, wear whatever makes you comfortable, go wherever you wanna go, blast the music and dance like a lunatic if it makes you happy.
If you do not let yourself be happy, no one is going to do it for you. So either take matters into your own hands or shut the hell u p and do not blame other people.
You know that saying that you should do good and not expect anything in return? Don't take it too seriously. What happens most of the time is that you do good over and over again, people get used to it and thats the fastest way of becoming a doormat. Do not give anyone the chance to abuse you. So yes, be good to people, help them if you can, but you do not have to sacrifice your happiness for people who do not appreciate it.
I understand sacrificing for people you love, and poeple who appreciate what you do. But giving up your own happiness and that of people who care about you for the sake of others who are just going to turn around and stab you in the back, that I don't get.
I am becoming a strong believer of the fact that the most important person in your life should be you. If you are not well enough to be able to take care of yourself and provide your own happiness then you will never be able to achieve anything and you will never be able to be of any help to people who truly need you. I've heard this several times from my best friend but have only started to realize how true it is.
The point of all this rambling is that YOU are the only person who can stand in your own way by choosing to be negative, by not giving yourself a chance, by constantly doubting yourself and by not caring enough for your own needs. Cut it out. Take a breath. Loosen up. Go do something nice for yourself. You deserve it. Screw other people, screw society, screw everyone who's ever made you feel any less than amazing. YOU are phenomenal. Act like it.
more at http://deludedkitten.blogspot.com/
Lucy, I love this. there is a good chance I am printing this out and putting it up on my fridge, amazing. Thank you for sharing.